Dear Falcons

I'd like to start out by saying it's not you. It's me.


It's hard for me to say this, and I've been wrestling with this decision for weeks now, but I think today I've definitely made up my mind.


I think I'd like to follow another football team.


I need to follow another football team. I'm thinking the Jets. Not because they're a better team than you--in fact, they are probably one of the two or three teams in the NFL that is worse than you. No, it's because, while the Jets also suck, they do so in a way that is refreshing and entertaining.


Instead of sucking the way you do--predictably.


Hell, who am I kidding? It is you.


Today is a case-in-point, with the game in London against the Lions. A Lions team missing several key players, including their future Hall of Famer wide receiver, Calvin Hill. Yes, you jumped out to a 21-point lead in the first half.


Score at the end of the first half: Atlanta 21, Detroit 0.


I said predictable. How many points did you score in the second half?


Zero.


How many points did the Lions score in the second half?


Twenty-two.


If you need help with the math, here's the final score:


Atlanta 21, Detroit 22.


22 is one more point than 21. Which means you lose.


Your record now is 2-6. I'm thinking 2-14 is within reach.


That number on the left is the number of wins. That number on the right is the number of losses. Ideally you want the number on the left to be higher than the one on the right. The bigger difference between the two, the better. The other way around--the way it is now--is not good.


An NFL game is composed of two halves. That's why they're called "halves." No matter how well you do in the first one, you still need to come out and play in the second one, too.


Look, from what I'm seeing, it looks like all the passion in this relationship is one-sided. You just don't seem to care anymore.


Not only do you lose, you're boring.


So, I'll follow the Jets, or some other team. Sure, I'll still watch your games, but my heart won't be in it until I see where you've actually made real changes. Like doing what every other team in the NFL does that wins games occasionally--making adjustments at halftime, even when they have a lead.


Your lack of a pass rush is tremendously unattractive, and it's something you keep promising you'll address, and, somehow, that never happens.


I've followed you since you've existed. Almost a life-long commitment for me. But I keep seeing the same old crap from you, no matter who your owner is, no matter who your coaches are, no matter who your players are.


Same old crap. Every season.


So, I'll leave it up to you. If you want to salvage this relationship, you'll address this pass rush thing, seriously, for once, in a way that shows results. And you'll begin making adjustments at halftime instead of doing whatever it is you're doing now--smoking cigars and drinking tequila shooters, I'm guessing.


The ball is in your court, Falcons. Are we still a thing, or should I finally just give up on you and move on?

Sunday morning watching football randomocity

So, I'm sitting here watching my Atlanta Falcons play the Detroit Lions. Yes, the time stamp is correct--they're playing in England, so airtime for the game here in the States is 9 a.m.


At the moment the Falcons have the lead. I have an idea for a pretty funny posting for this blog when they lose again, so of course they'll win. Whatever they have to do to break my heart, they'll do.


Like most people I'm getting tired of the political ads. I am drawing some hope from the tone of the Republican attack ads--they're repeating the same tired old, and long since debunked lies that their base will believe no matter what. They sound desperate. Let's hope they have good reason to be desperate. It'd tickle me to no end to see Georgia turn blue after the midterms.


Speaking of elections, I took part in early voting. I wish there was a way I could opt out of having to endure all these stupid commercials for candidates now, since they're irrelevant to me. Oh, well.


I've been on vacation all week. For once I didn't have a particular goal I wanted to accomplish. I had some errands, but no definite projects I wanted to work on. It's been pretty glorious, to be honest.


Though I did make a start on the script for this pilot for this TV show idea I've had for a while. It's coming along pretty well so far. I can definitely work with what I've got on the page now, tweaking it to get the tone I'm looking for.


I'm waiting for my first readers to give me their notes on The Sorcerer's Daughter. I've heard from both of them that they are enjoying it so far, so that's heartening. I'm trying to resist doing another read-through until I hear from them. It'd be kind of pointless for me to do a rewrite before then. They're both extremely busy people so I'm just glad they're taking the time to do this for me.


And it's back to work for me tomorrow morning, after being off all week. That usually means my Monday morning will be crazy busy.  I guess that's a good thing, though.


Wow. The Lions still haven't scored on the Falcon's porous defense. Maybe they've got jet lag or something. I'm entirely sure it won't last.

Getting started on something new. Finally.

So, I finally feel like I can sit down and start on the pilot to this TV show thing I've been going on and on about.


Yeah, there are still a couple of technical issues that I haven't resolved, but to hell with those. I can either figure out a way around them, or make it so they're no longer issues.


All this while I'm waiting on the notes from my first readers for The Sorcerer's Daughter.


I think most writers, when they are at this point on a project, work on short stories and the like. My problem is I rarely have ideas for short stories--most of my ideas are for projects that will take a while, like a year or so. Short stories just aren't my thing.


Anyways, I'll start banging away on this later today. I'll also start plotting out the series arcs, character trajectories, and so forth. Writing the series bible, in other words.


By the tine I get the notes back on the novel I'll be at the point where I can then work on both projects at the same time.


I'll also be watching football. Lots and lots of football. Which is what I did yesterday, actually, all day long.


I'll be working on some painting, too. I still have a couple of photos from my recent trip to Chattanooga of those lovely flowers that were growing outside of the venue. I'm priming a canvas now for it, and I'll be moving from writing to painting back to writing most of the day I'm guessing.


All the while the football game playing in the background, providing a necessary distraction when one is needed.


This is as good as it gets.

Time to breathe . . .

I've now done three rewrites of The Sorcerer's Daughter.


I'm at the point where I need some outside opinions on it, so I've sent it to a good friend who is also a good editor for her to take a look. I'm also asking another old friend who is quite an excellent writer herself as well as someone with good very good taste to look it over. Haven't heard back from her yet---she may be too busy to help me out--but she's an excellent first reader so I hope she can.


In the meantime I need to set it aside and quit fiddling with it, until I get the notes back from my friends.


So, what do I do while I wait? Well, plan the next project!


I've got a very basic idea for something an old buddy of mine calls a "bitter homeboy novel." I'll be mulling that over, writing down some thoughts on it, maybe plotting it out.


There's also that pilot for a TV show that I keep droning on and on about. I need to get some work done on that, too. In fact, that'll probably take up most of my creative writing time until I need to resume working on The Sorcerer's Daughter.


It's hard, just letting it sit, but screwing around with it now, while I wait for input from my first readers, would be counter-productive. But sit it must, for now.


I'm taking a couple days off from work--in addition to the holiday--to sort of give myself a chance to breathe, think, mull over, make some decisions, take care of some business. And just relax, without stressing out about anything, for a while.


How am I celebrating Labor Day? Like I said--relaxing. Thinking pleasant thoughts. Maybe watch a few movies or something. I'm not planning on going anywhere, unless something really good turns up.


So, if you are celebrating Labor Day, what are your plans?

Post read-through randomocity

I finished the second rewrite of The Sorcerer's Daughter today.


I still think it's pretty good. I like the characters, and the ending, and I think the language I've used is effective and evocative. I think people will dig it.


Of course, I'm the worst judge of my own work. Hopefully, when I get someone else to read it, I'll get a more honest and detached assessment of its quality.


But that will have to wait a little while longer. I'm planning on spending all day tomorrow just reading it again, straight through, just to get an idea as to the pacing, the flow of the narrative. I won't be making any changes with this pass, though I'll be noting areas that need a little more work.


I did get some ideas for my next novel project, when I'm done with this one. It'll be sort of a coming-of-age psychological thriller. I've got all of the pieces I think I'll need for this one but I'm not sure yet how they'll all fit together.


No hurry, though. It's going to be a while before I can actually work on something else, and I do still have this TV show pilot that I want to write, too. So, I have plenty of time to plot this thing out.


It's been a very long week. I can't go into why, except to say it involves my day job and some frustrations I'm having there. I've got some time off scheduled next week, which I'm planning to devote to working on my manuscript and maybe the TV show project, and that'll give me a respite from all that crap, too.


It's nearly time for the NFL to get started again. I can't wait. Football, how I've missed you!


Oh, well. I'm rambling. But that's why it's called "randomocity."

Struggling to find the cheerful . . .

What a depressing week last week was.


Robin Williams dying, and then the situation in Ferguson, has made me sort of wonder what the point in everything is.


Robin Williams's suicide isn't a mystery to me--I wasn't surprised to learn about his struggles with depression and addiction. Having suffered most of my life with depression--and being hospitalized for it twice--I understand a bit what he was going through and how others around him didn't know about it.


And, for the record, here's my advice if you have someone in your life who suffers from depression. Commit to being there for him or her, or stay away. In other words, don't promise to be there if you don't mean it. Because once you make that promise, the person you made that promise to is going to expect you to be there when their world is at its darkest. If they call on you and you aren't there for them, that makes it much worse. As to what you should do if and when they call? Listen. Maybe they don't have anything to say, and maybe you don't know what to say, and that's fine. As long as they know you are there, and willing to listen, as long as there is that connection, that helps immeasurably. So, even if they call and there's nothing but silence on the line, as long as they know you are on the line, that'll help.


If, however, you promised to be there and they call on you and you just don't have time for them or don't feel like dealing with them, that will only make whatever they're going through that much worse. I can't stress that enough--if you don't think you can be there for that person, then don't make that promise.


As for what's going on in Ferguson, I can't even talk about it now. The authorities in that city provoked the whole thing and they keep making it worse. It seems like nobody in charge has any clue how to handle a volatile situation--it almost seems like they are deliberately trying to keep things stirred up there. It's like they asked experts in how to handle these types of things and did the opposite of what they were told. It's going to get a lot worse there over the next few days, and it'll all be so unnecessary.


I've spent the weekend working on my manuscript, painting, trying to stay inside my own little world for a while. I feel a bit better about things now, but we'll see how long that lasts, when I have to go back out into the world tomorrow.


As for The Sorcerer's Daughter,  I'm pretty happy with the progress I'm making with the rewrite. I'll be through it for the second time in the next couple of days. One or two more passes and I'll be ready to send it to a friend of mine who is a good editor for her to look it over and rip it apart.


So, I've managed to get some stuff done, in spite of this dark mood I've been in lately. I'd say that's a minor victory.

There's no place like home . . .

I got back from my business trip a couple of days ago, safe and sound. And thoroughly reminded of how much I hate to travel.


I did have an alarming moment in my hotel room on Tuesday night. I was wishing I was home and when I closed my eyes and tried to conjure mental images of "home" what came up were images of my apartment back in Savannah. It actually took me a moment to remember what this place here looked like. Sort of freaked me out for a minute.


It's not like I just moved here. I've lived here over three years. But I had to struggle to remember what the living room looked like--I kept envisioning my old living room from before.


Anyway, that was weird.


I was hoping to get a little background work done while I was away, maybe research a couple of things for this TV show idea, and get some work done on that. Did I? Hell, no. I pretty much just vegged out the whole time I wasn't required to do anything. Didn't do a lick of work on any of my own projects.


I did take some pictures of some beautiful flowers at the venue where the event was held. I've started painting one of them now. An associate told me they were Knockout Roses. I guess she would know.


This same associate committed a couple of big time sins when I went to show her the pictures of the flowers I'd taken, by the way--she took the phone I used to take the pics away from me and dropped it (no harm done other than an unwanted adrenaline surge) and then she started flipping through my photo album, even though I asked her not to. Oh, well. She won't be able to unsee some of the things she saw, and she has no-one but herself to blame. She did like the flower pictures, though.


I got home Thursday afternoon, pretty much as tired as I've been in a long time. So tired, in fact, I decided to forego my plan to begin the second pass through my manuscript yesterday. Instead I spent most of the day relaxing as much as I could.


Yeesh. Being around people all flipping day long is exhausting. At the end of the day some of my associates wanted to go out on the town. I wanted to go back to my hotel room, lock the door, and just sit and stare off into space until it was time to go to bed. Which is pretty much what I wound up doing.


Hopefully this will be the last of these things I'll have to do for a while. It'll take me at least a year to finish recovering from this one!